Ayane, Lee Ji-hoon's wife, made a final clarification mentioning her native Japan's culture regarding the controversies over "daycare candy distribution" and "baby no-salt".
On the 10th Ayane said, "I lived in Japan for 20 years and was familiar with children's snack culture, but experiencing Korean daycare culture for the first time made me notice the difference. However, because I did not explain the matter in detail and simply used the term "shocked," misunderstandings seem to have grown," and she said, "In Japan there is an atmosphere recommending not giving candy to children under 3, and in fact many daycares prohibit candy and the like. So rather than meaning 'my child ate candy at daycare,' I was surprised in the sense of 'there is a culture of giving candy at daycare'".
She continued, "I once saw news that candy, jelly and rice cakes were banned at daycares, and the packaging was labeled 'candy,' which confused me. But I also know well that having lived abroad for a long time does not entitle me to impose my values on others," adding, "I never meant to say that Korean daycares that give candy are wrong. The types of candy and methods of distribution vary by country, and I think it's right to live according to that culture. I think when in Rome you should follow Rome's rules."
Ayane also said, "It wasn't that I was shocked by the situation itself, but I used the word 'shocked' because I was surprised by a cultural difference I had not experienced before. I believe my child is growing up in a good environment attending daycare in Korea, and I have never complained about that or thought Japan was better. I did not mean to imply that one piece of candy would cause a serious problem for the child or intend a serious meaning. Rather, I think there was a difference between the nuance of expression I intended and how it is received in Korea," and she confessed, "I also know that even if I try to control it, the child will eventually eat everything. I only wanted to do my best within what I can do, and I never forced anyone or made rude requests to the daycare and have no intention of doing so. But I truly apologize to the daycare teachers that my SNS post could have been written in a way that felt like that."
Ayane said, "Among the comments were responses like 'sounds like no-salt nonsense,' and when I mentioned WHO recommendations many asked, 'Then why leave the child at daycare before 36 months?' But childcare is ultimately the parents' choice, and I don't believe there is a 100% right or wrong answer," adding, "I think the right answer is for each child and family to live according to their circumstances. I also know I cannot impose my family environment or values on public institutions. I only explained because it seemed some people viewed the no-salt practice itself negatively because of misunderstandings about my post. I did not intend to muddy the issue or change the subject. I am just grateful that the daycare director and teachers understood the situation and recognized it as a misunderstanding."
She added, "If anyone felt uncomfortable after reading my post, I hope this clears up some misunderstandings. As a first-time parent I lack cultural and factual knowledge in many areas. I appreciate both advice and criticism, and I also thank you for supportive comments and DMs," and she added, "But even after I explained my intent was misunderstood, I hope there will be no more abusive language or malicious comments and DMs bringing up unrelated matters."
Meanwhile, on the 7th Ayane posted on her channel that "it was a bit shocking," saying she had found candy in her daughter Ruhee's daycare bag.
There was suspicion that she had publicly targeted the daycare, saying candy given by the daycare was found even though her eldest daughter Ruhee is still following the no-salt practice. As the controversy spread, on the 9th Lee Ji-hoon also apologized via SNS, saying "Our Ruhee is no-salt (she does not have her hair dyed). Sorry for the fuss."
The following is the full text of Ayane's post on the controversy
I am speaking about the story for which you gave so much advice.
First, the daycare contacted me yesterday and we talked through this morning. I apologized and said I was very sorry if the content, which had potential for misunderstanding, was reported and spread and hurt the teachers.
The director said the article was more sensational than the story I posted and that parents might have been more embarrassed, and she also apologized to the teacher in charge saying that there was no such intent. The teacher said there was no misunderstanding, but I apologized again anyway.
Even if there was no such intent, if there was room for listeners to take it that way, I think I was wrong. I should have explained in more detail, or I should not have posted the story.
In fact, when I said "no-salt but shocked that she ate candy," it was not that I felt "shocked because the daycare didn't follow my rule." On the story I posted my immediate surprised feeling without detailed explanation, which seems to have caused more misunderstanding.
I lived in Japan for 20 years and was familiar with children's snack culture, but experiencing Korean daycare culture for the first time made me notice the difference. However, because I did not explain the matter in detail and simply used the term "shocked," misunderstandings seem to have grown.
In Japan there is an atmosphere recommending not giving candy to children under 3, and in fact many daycares prohibit candy and the like. So rather than meaning, "my child ate candy at daycare," I was surprised in the sense of, "there is a culture of giving candy at daycare."
I once saw news that candy, jelly and rice cakes were banned at daycares, and the packaging was labeled 'candy,' which confused me. But I also know well that having lived abroad for a long time does not entitle me to impose my values on others.
I never meant to say that Korean daycares that give candy are wrong. The types of candy and methods of distribution vary by country, and I think it's right to live according to that culture. I think when in Rome you should follow Rome's rules.
It wasn't that I was shocked by the situation itself; I used the term "shocked" because I was surprised by a cultural difference I had not experienced. I believe my child is growing up in a good environment attending daycare in Korea, and I have never complained about that or thought Japan was better.
Also, in Japan the word "shocked" is often used relatively lightly and casually. It is sometimes used simply to mean "surprised," not a truly serious situation, and I used it with that nuance.
I did not mean to imply that one piece of candy would cause a serious problem for the child or intend a serious meaning. Rather, I think there was a difference between the nuance of expression I intended and how it is received in Korea.
I also know that even if I try to control it, the child will eventually eat everything. I only wanted to do my best within what I can do, and I never forced anyone or made rude requests to the daycare and have no intention of doing so. But I truly apologize to the daycare teachers that my SNS post could have been written in a way that felt like that.
The daycare said many parents want to avoid such matters, so there is no problem with their response, and I was really grateful for that. If such a response had been difficult or burdensome, I had wondered whether to reconsider daycare enrollment itself, so I was very thankful they said it was possible, and that is why I sent my child.
In fact I was also considering home care. But the daycare I wanted called about the order, and when we went for a trial with the child I loved seeing the child interact with other children. Seeing that I felt my child needed time with friends more than home care.
Also, because I experienced miscarriage and in vitro fertilization and was balancing work during pregnancy, I decided to send the child to daycare.
Among the comments were responses like "sounds like no-salt nonsense," and when I mentioned WHO recommendations many asked, "Then why leave the child at daycare before 36 months?"
But childcare is ultimately the parents' choice, and I don't believe there is a 100% right or wrong answer. Global standards like those from the WHO are only recommendations, and not following them does not mean a child will be raised poorly.
However, because the recommendations are based on long-term research, I thought it wouldn't hurt to follow them if possible. That said, I don't think a big difference arises between children raised that way and those who are not.
I was able to practice no-salt from 24 months, but home care before 36 months was realistically difficult, so I could not do it.
I think the right answer is for each child and family to live according to their circumstances. I also know I cannot impose my family environment or values on public institutions. I only explained because it seemed some people viewed the no-salt practice itself negatively because of misunderstandings about my post. I did not intend to muddy the issue or change the subject.
I am just grateful that the daycare director and teachers understood the situation and recognized it as a misunderstanding.
If anyone felt uncomfortable after reading my post, I hope this clears up some misunderstandings. As a first-time parent I lack cultural and factual knowledge in many areas. I appreciate both advice and criticism, and I also thank you for supportive comments and DMs
However, it is unfortunate that sensational expressions in articles and characterizations that I was abusing power or targeting a specific subject made the original misunderstanding spread as if it were fact. It was sometimes interpreted in a completely different direction from what I originally posted.
As long as I post on a public account, I think it's natural to hear various opinions. But even after I explained my intent was misunderstood, I hope there will be no more abusive language or malicious comments and DMs bringing up unrelated matters
Finally, please be generous in understanding that since I wrote directly in a language that is not my native tongue there may be inappropriate expressions or awkward parts. I hope no further misunderstandings arise.<
[Photo] Ayane, Lee Ji-hoon SNS
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