Chef Jeong Ji-seon was diagnosed with workaholism due to trauma.
In the program aired on the 16th, 'The Boss's Ears are Donkey Ears,' Chef Jeong was seen meeting with psychiatrist Lee Kwang-min.
On that day, when asked about the reason he thought he should seek counseling, he said, "I think it's fun to do new things. I'm one of the most successful star chefs in South Korea these days. I've been to Taiwan and Japan because I'm being sought after everywhere. Honestly, as a person, it's hard. It's exhausting, and I get tired. I could reduce my ambition, but the stress of not working is greater than the stress of working, so I would rather be stressed while working. Work is fun. I do it because it's fun. That's the answer. So I work more."
He stated, "I leave at 6 a.m., and when I'm late, it's 1 or 2 a.m.; when I come early, it's around 10 p.m. I haven't thought about resting yet. I find happiness in that. I think I sleep about 4 hours a day. Yesterday, I slept for 2.5 hours," adding, "I usually eat one full meal a day. I can live without eating. I don't even think about food."
When asked if he's ever felt tired or experienced burnout, he replied, "Actually, just seeing ingredients makes the story of the food come out. I've stressed out when that doesn't happen. When my mind doesn't work, I wonder if my brain is broken, so I found a way: I got an IV about three times a week. Getting an IV clears my head. When I felt burnout, I was getting it three times a week."
After that, Chef Jeong underwent tests and had in-depth counseling. He pinpointed his greatest worry as being his son. Chef Jeong said, "As for worries, it's my son, who is 12 and about to enter the fifth grade of elementary school. He's a really good kid. Even though his mom is so busy, he doesn't complain much and accepts it. But when he was six years old, he said he didn't want to live like his mom. That little child. I thought, 'Wow, he's saying that a person lives without rest.' A child who hasn't even entered school says such things. I haven't spent much time with my family. That's a concern. There's so much I want to do, but I also have to care for my son."
When asked when he last saw his son, he replied it was four days ago. He questioned, "Do I need to cut back on work to spend time with my family?" to which he could not easily respond, saying, "I don't know what to do. When I think about my son, I think I should cut back on work, but it seems like the life of a working mom is unavoidable. I realized I felt foolish because of my son. I loved cooking and only focused on cooking. I had no interest in anything else. But after my son was born, he started asking me various questions, like who's famous in soccer and what awards players have won. Every time he asks me these nonsensical questions, I realize how much I don't know. I've lived all this time without even looking at what I had no interest in, but because of my child, I need to be interested and study. When my son and husband talk, it's endless. Suddenly, they talk about soccer, and they know everything. I can't join in on that. I'm worried he won't communicate with me anymore, so I think I need to study."
Describing the ideal woman as Sin Saimdang, he said, "She is a wise person. I have the impression that she raised her children well. For me, I love and enjoy work this much, but I also want to raise my child wonderfully. I want to do both well. I think if I sleep a little less and do a little less, I can manage both."
Afterwards, Chef Jeong stated that both his strengths and conditions for happiness are 'effort.' He said, "I believe that results come from effort. I didn't have a smooth path to employment, so to showcase my worth and abilities, I studied abroad and went to university, and even though I won culinary contests, it was very hurtful when my experience was dismissed and I wasn't selected. So whenever a job opportunity came, I ran without rest. Honestly, it was less about money and more about the happiness of being able to work."
The psychiatrist diagnosed him saying, "It seems that the trauma from people not employing you has led to workaholism." Chef Jeong noted, "I was always anxious. Even after getting married and having a baby, I hid the pregnancy for four months out of fear of being let go. In the kitchen, if you get pregnant, you couldn't keep your position. I endured morning sickness and struggled with food smells, eating ice from the freezer and white rice with seaweed late at night when I returned home. When my energy was low, I had to eat, focusing on foods that didn't smell. I wore a mask and pinched my nose while eating," adding, "I worked until the day before my baby was born; I had come out for an emergency a month prior, but I just kept working. I don't know if it would be different if I had gotten a job immediately, but because I didn't have that, I feel that if I miss an opportunity, it may never come back."
The psychiatrist explained, "But it's not that time anymore. The situation now is completely different from when you studied abroad in your 20s. You possess sufficient abilities, influence, and acknowledgment from others, yet your heart remains in your 20s. This is a characteristic of trauma. You cannot live in the present, and you repeatedly live with a heart from the past. This can be very harsh."
Chef Jeong stated that he wishes to forget moments from his 20s. He said, "The times when I was ignored and not chosen lasted a long time. I still remember that feeling continually." He explained, "Last year, I made a big mistake when life found its way to me; in May, that timing coincided with the shop's opening, and I was studying abroad and bringing in equipment. Naturally, I thought I was healthy, so my baby would be healthy as well at nine weeks. I thought it would definitely be healthy. However, I had too many expectations at that time, and my husband, son, in-laws, and parents had too many expectations for the baby, so I felt a lot of guilt."
He particularly mentioned, "I worked right then as well. With the store opening approaching, I didn't have time to rest. I thought being sad would be a waste of time. I don't want to think about (the baby) again. I don't want to fall into sadness by reconsidering. I just want to say, 'This also happened.'" At the same time, he noted his greatest wrongdoing was 'miscarriage.' Chef Jeong said, "I failed to protect it, so that's a wrongdoing. Wrongdoing is wrongdoing," to which Kim Sook responded, "This is nobody's fault." Chef Jeong mentioned, "I just try to avoid regret. I'm trying to forget it."
The psychiatrist pointed out, "It seems that you see work as a solution to your worries. Work shouldn't become a tool for avoidance. If it does, it will fester. Regardless of what it is, it can be family, health, or relationships." He suggested, "The first solution is to find a hobby. Something unrelated to cooking. If you tell someone to do absolutely nothing, they likely can't do it. They'd be restless. Exploring types of exercise might not be a bad idea. You need to create something in an area outside of work to reduce the ambition for work."
Meanwhile, after finishing the counseling, Chef Jeong visited a kickboxing gym. He explained, "I've always wanted to try kickboxing or drumming if I were to have a hobby, and as far as I know, kickboxing is practiced by people with very stressful jobs. Chef Anh Sung-jae has also been into boxing for a long time, so I thought it would be a suitable exercise for me."
After experiencing kickboxing, Chef Jeong noted, "I think for 2 or 3 hours while moving my body and sweating and challenging something new, I didn't think about work. It's been a long time since I didn't think about work. It's not about being ambitious; work is just something I do because it's fun. I will continue this."
[Photo] KBS2
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